The death of a partner will likely be one of the most difficult and trying experiences of your life. One day you have a lover, a confidant, a best friend...and the next, all of these important roles in your life have been left vacant.
It's true that there is strength in numbers. Relying on and confiding in others who understand firsthand what you are going through can be a real lifeline as you mourn your loss. Like Elizabeth Gilbert said in her famed memoir, Eat, Pray, Love, “Deep grief sometimes is almost like a specific location, a coordinate on a map of time. When you are standing in that forest of sorrow, you cannot imagine that you could ever find your way to a better place. But if someone can assure you that they themselves have stood in that same place, and now have moved on, sometimes this will bring hope.”
One of the best ways to feel a sense of community as a widow is through some kind of group activity, whether that means a formal support group, or even just something from the comfort of your own home. Here are some ideas for finding community during a difficult time:
Join a widow support group
Whether you attend a church or hospice sponsored group, a regional social group, or even just engage in an online community, allow yourself to lean on the sisterhood of women that understands what you're going through. It may surprise you to learn that between 7% and 16% of all adult women worldwide are widows, according to the UN Division for the Advancement of Women. While this is clearly not a statistic to celebrate, it may comfort you to know that you are not alone. Some resources we recommend include Refuge In Grief, Hope Floats, and our monthly Rise Up "Zoom Up" zoom call.
Find a group hobby
Maybe you're not keen on the idea of constantly discussing the grief you're going through, and that's ok. There is no right or wrong way to mourn. Still, surrounding yourself with others is a positive step on the journey to your healing. Finding a group hobby is another great way to feel a sense of community. Consider a weekly yoga class, a hiking club, a workshop...the options are endless!
Let your loved ones in
It may seem like common sense, but this is an important time to let your friends and family in, rather than shutting yourself off. Let the ones that love you be there for you. Lean on them, talk to them, cry to them. Nobody expects you to do this on your own.
And don't forget that we're here for you, too. While we can't bring your partner back, we can remove some uncertainty from the equation. Let us be a shoulder to lean on and a second set of eyes for your financial situation. Learn more about Curve Ball Life Planning™ today.